Towel swings

We laughed as we thought about how much Ava will love towel swings. John started this when Simeon was a baby. The towel wraps in front under the armpits, and the corners meet in back. The parent grabs both top and bottom corners together in the back, swings the kid all around, airplane style, then throws him or her on the bed, towel and all. I would include a picture, except I don't think we have ever taken a picture, (now that I'm looking for one). I'll grab the camera next time. The kids learned, pretty early on, that you DO NOT want MOM to give you a towel swing, especially over the tile floors, because Mom is neither coordinated or strong enough to hold both ends of the towel together at the same time. Oooops!

This is a test....

I have a suspicion my husband is not reading my blog, even though he SAYS he does....occasionally. Now I will know for sure! The story behind this picture, is that he only got 3 hours of sleep last night. That is 2 hours less than his usual 5 hours of sleep. He laid on the floor to pop his back while Simeon read to him, and 30 seconds later he was asleep. Simeon and I had a good laugh, and then I ran and grabbed the camera!

I saw on some magazine cover, or website recently, that Brad Pitt was considered the "SEXIEST DAD ALIVE". I would have to disagree. I think the man you see above is....without a doubt.... the sexiest dad alive.

We had so much fun today, just the two of us going to get our fingerprints. It really did seem like an extended date, and we got to talk about all kinds of things that we don't normally have a chance to squeeze in with 4 kids constantly interrupting and needing attention. One of the things that came up in conversation was the fact that we really don't want to focus on the fact that Ava will have Down Syndrome. We want to treat her just like any other child. In fact we might want to rename it, "Princess Syndrome", or "Angel Syndrome". I realize Mr. Down discovered this chromosomal disorder, but why did it have to be named after him?!! DOWN syndrome!?

One step closer

We had our fingerprints scanned today at the USCIS office. That stands for United States Citizenship and Immigration Services...I think? Something having to do with immigration anyway. I asked John why we had to do this. Neither one of us have any idea. I guess they have to make sure we are not criminals or terrorists or something? Who knows. I never thought to ask. But it is done anyway. Typically it would take 6 weeks to receive our approval. With "proof" of a medical condition, they can speed it up to 2 weeks or so. It's very difficult to get proof of anything regarding a child we have never seen before, but thankfully we did remember to bring a copy of the letter my doctor wrote, stating that we "hope" to adopt a child that "apparently" has a heart condition that will "apparently" need surgery. That doesn't sound too official, but maybe they will reward our efforts at least! We can pray anyway. :)

Speaking of praying, I have been praying for all kinds of silly things lately. I hope the Lord doesn't mind. I pray that all the forms will get into the hands of very emotionally sensitive women, who are very compassionate and cry at the drop of a hat....and those women will put our papers at the top of the pile! My kids are praying to have Ava home by Christmas, and as we get farther and farther into this adoption, the more realize how unrealistic that really is. Yet the way I see it, it doesn't hurt to ask. After reading a biography about George Mueller as a family about 6 months ago, I have more confidence asking the Lord for things. George Mueller was a man who lived as a missionary to orphans in England in the 1800s. He had such trust in God for every little thing in life, not just for himself and his family but for the orphans in his care as well. Once he sat all the orphans down at the breakfast table, even though there was no food for breakfast that day, and they prayed and thanked the Lord for the food that they were about to receive. Just as they finished praying there was a knock at the door, with loads of freshly baked bread and fresh milk!!

The God George Mueller served is the same God we serve, so why not ask to have Ava home by Christmas! Of course, Andrea reminded me that they don't celebrate Christmas in "Eastern Europe" until the end of January! So maybe we will have her home for "Christmas" after all!

Strange love

It's hard to explain to people how much I already love this daughter whom I have never met. Of course, the question everyone asks, is, "Have you been out there to see her?" Not actually, no. But in my thoughts and dreams I have already held and kissed her a thousand times. I go to bed praying for her every night and wake up every morning wondering whether someone is holding her or whether she is eating or napping (7 hours ahead of us). I realized yesterday that I am not the only one. On our way to church, Simeon said, "Mom I had a dream last night that Ava was at our table eating applesauce." Then Liesel said, "I had a dream about Ava too. I dreamed she ran and fell down and got a big purple bump, but she wasn't crying." Yesterday Hope drew me a picture. She said it was a picture of "Ava in mommy's tummy".

John and I have imagined meeting her for the first time. We will have butterflies for days before, and we know we will cry as we pick her up for the first time. We laugh about the fact that we will be sobbing and laughing at the same time, and she will be thinking, "Who are these strange people and what is wrong with them?!"

Three!

Can she be three already? How well I remember that Friday night 3 years ago. It was a beautiful home birth. She was a beautiful and healthy baby...girl. We had a midwife and no ultrasound, so all of our babies were a "surprise". What a beautiful night that was. And here she is now, all girl, 3 years later!

I did find that pink clown. Here she is, Sweet Pea. Sweet Pea is 20 years old and today was her first real clown gig. She was perfect!

Cheap entertainment (very cheap)!

It was a fun evening with the cousins. They stayed the night so their parents could have the night to themselves. After watching Napoleon Dynamite for the 37th time, they all did their impressions of Napoleon's dance, then we had fun with scotch tape. Who ever thought scotch tape could provide so much entertainment?

Baby Hope and Baby Ava

Here is the picture Hope drew for me. It is "Big Mommy" holding "Baby Hope' and "Baby Ava". I look like I have some sort of thyroid disorder, not to mention I'm balding on top, but I think it is a beautiful picture anyway!

"Making art"

This is the conversation I had with Hope tonight:

Hope: "Mommy, at my 'chool some boys laughed at me."
Me: "Really? And what did you do?"
Hope: "I just laughed at them too"
Me: "Then what happened?"
Hope: "We made out."
Me: "YOU WHAT?!"
Hope: "We made out."
Me: "You made out?!"
Hope: "NO! We made OUT."
Me: "You made art?"
Hope: "Yeah, we made out (art)"

Whew!!!!

A new bed for Ava

I rearranged the girls' room and made a space for Ava with a toddler bed I found at a garage sale this morning. It looks so cute with the blanket you made for her, Oma! Thank you! It fits perfect and matches too. I'm not sure if she'll be able to sleep in it right away but it's nice to know she has her "own" space now. In case you were wondering, our bedrooms are always this clean! :)

The other night during our family devotions we were talking about how things will change when Ava is part of our family. Jude got pretty defensive, and said, "But Mom, Ava ALREADY IS part of our family!"

Great timing!

Look what Jude lost last night....just in time for school pictures today!

The dangers of multitasking...

I read a book once to learn how to manage my time better, and be more efficient in my housework, etc. One chapter was titled "Microwave Moments", and gave examples of how to make better use of one's time. For example, while waiting for your popcorn to pop, you can wipe down the kitchen counters, or while brushing your teeth, you can wipe down your bathroom sink and counters. Another good idea is to clean the shower while you are in it. You get the idea. It's brilliant...

....Unless you have signs of alzheimers disease, or too many children to keep track of. For example, I learned NOT to run and quickly throw a load of clothes in the washing machine while filling up the kitchen sink with water for mopping. I learned once NOT to go check the mail while waiting for a quesadilla to finish warming. Today I learned NOT to clean a bathroom while waiting for a toddler to find a hiding spot for hide-and-seek. Attached is a picture of how I found her in her favorite hiding spot...under her bed.

Special Needs

Special needs....Why would we voluntarily sign up to be the parents of a child with "special needs"? After all, hasn't every expectant parent said, "We don't care if it's a boy or a girl as long as it's healthy!"

All I can say, is that ever since I was a little girl (ask my parents), I used to want to adopt handicapped children. I believe the Lord put that on my heart from a very early age. I remember going to visit the orphanages with my missionary parents in Mexico, and seeing so many deformed and disabled children. A missionary friend of my parents had adopted 3 boys, one who was born with a terrible skin disease as a result of being a product of incest. He had a cleft palate/lip, and basically had no skin. He constantly had infections all over his body, and ended up dying at the age of 10. This made an impact on my life. Later I babysat for a boy who had fallen off the roof when he was 2 years old, and suffered severe brain damage as a result. I adored him and he loved me too! In college I volunteered in a school for handicapped children and worked in a group home for mentally retarded adults. It was my favorite job ever.

So poor John, when we first talked about marriage, I told him of my desire to adopt. Not just adopt, but adopt a child that nobody else would want. He said he would be "open" to it. It came up again in our pre-marriage counseling, and again, he said he was "open" to it. So....4 healthy children later, I still had that strong desire to adopt. Last winter during basketball season, Liesel had a girl on her team who had a younger 4 year old sister with Down Syndrome. While we waited for practice to be done, little H. and I would talk and smile at each other (actually, I talked, and she smiled). After a few practices, I came home one night and told John I wanted to adopt a child with Downs. Maybe he thought I was kidding, he didn't really respond. I told him again. He didn't say much.

After a few sleepless, tearful nights and a lot of tears shed during my quiet times, I began to "google" special needs adoption, specifically Down Syndrome adoption. I was very surprised to find out that in the U.S. there is a 200+ family waiting list to adopt a child with Down Syndrome! (even though 85-90% of fetuses diagnosed with Downs are aborted!! So sad). But I also learned that it is just the opposite in many other countries. Children born with DS or any other disability, in some countries, are abandoned 99% of the time, and are rarely adopted! So...I found my new favorite website reecesrainbow.com My new favorite person, Andrea, is dedicated to promote the international adoption of children with Down syndrome as well as other disabilities. I emailed her many many times, and learned about many of the children that were waiting. Well John was still not QUITE ready, but still "open" as he always had been before. ("Open", as long as the child was high functioning, no medical concerns, no heart defect, etc.)

Then....June 15....I will never forget that day. There was an email sent from Kelly, a humanitarian aide who had visited Alina several times in her little orphanage. She told the group about this sweet little girl who lays in her crib day and night. She can't crawl, she can't even sit up, but she has a smile that lights up the room. She can't talk or feed herself, but she giggles when you tickle her. She has a heart defect and will need surgery. She is 3 1/2. The policy of the country where she lives, is to send the unadopted handicapped orphans to a mental institution, where most will die soon afterward. She had 6 months before she would be sent there to die. I forwarded the email to John, knowing this little girl would not fit our "qualifications", and spent the rest of the day crying and praying for God to bring her a family that would save her from that awful, awful place, and love her forever.

Little did I know what the Lord was doing in John's heart as well when he received the same email. I will never forget the moment he called, and I thought he had been crying as well. He said, "I want her, do you?" YES!!! I DO!!! My heart was pounding as I typed to Andrea: We want her. Please help us through this. We are scared, but we KNOW God will give us the strength to get through every step!

About a week later, in a moment of panic, John opened his Bible and he read:

1 Peter 3: 13-17, which reads " 13 Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? 14 But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. "Do not fear what they fear[a]; do not be frightened."[b] 15 But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, 16 keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. 17 It is better, if it is God's will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil."

We both felt this was the most perfect confirmation from the Lord that we were indeed in His will, and that He would bless our faith in accepting the challenge and the adventure that He was offering us.

So why would we take on a special needs child? Well, my response to that is.... I believe EVERY child has "special" needs if the parents will take the time to discover them. For that matter, don't we all have special needs? I do! Some are apparent from the outside and others are hidden deep in the heart. Either way, Jesus offers healing, deliverance. He wants to be Ava's Saviour, and mine. And yours.

A twist on the Beatitudes

(Jill I stole this from one of your friend's blogs)

Beatitudes for People with Special Needs

BLESSED ARE YOU who take time to listen to difficult speech, for you help us to know that if we persevere we can be understood.

BLESSED ARE YOU who walk with us in public places, and ignore the stares of strangers, for in your friendship we feel good to be ourselves.

BLESSED ARE YOU who never bid us to "hurry up" and, more blessed, you who do not snatch our tasks from our hands to do them for us, for often we need time rather than help.

BLESSED ARE YOU who stand beside us as we enter new and untried ventures, for our unsuredness will be outweighed by the times when we surprise ourselves and you.

BLESSED ARE YOU who ask for our help and realize our giftedness for our greatest need is to be needed.

BLESSED ARE YOU who help us with the graciousness of Christ, for often we need the help we cannot ask for.

BLESSED ARE YOU when, by all things, you assure us that what makes us individuals is not our particular disability or difficulty but our beautiful God-given personhood which no handicapping condition can confine.

REJOICE AND BE EXCEEDINGLY GLAD for your understanding and love have opened doors for us to enjoy life to its full and you have helped us believe in ourselves as valued and gifted people.

3-pound watermelon

In kindergarten the kids were supposed to estimate the weight of a watermelon. When I peeked into the classroom I could see some kids guessed 1000 pounds, some guessed 10 pounds. Jude guessed the lowest, only 3 pounds. The actual weight was 20 pounds. When I asked him today about it, he said, "Well, it was only 3 pounds to me because I'm so strong."

crazy legs

Hope wanted me to carry her through the school parking lot. I said, "Why can't you just walk?" She said, "Because my legs are just crazy".

Speaking of Princesses....

Hope is having a birthday soon. She will be 3. She has been telling everyone she is having a pink clown come to her party. So what is a mother to do but locate a "pink clown" to attend the party? Anybody know of one that is cheap? She loved Huffy, who came to our neighbor's party last year, and for a year she has been telling everyone that Huffy will be coming to her party. Then just a few weeks ago she decided that since Huffy is a boy clown, he won't like princess parties, so we are going to have a girl clown! So I guess she has this thing all planned out....the problem is, everytime she gets mad at someone, she says they can't come to her "boat-day party". Today she said, "Daddy, you can't come to my boat-day party anymore". Then soon afterwards, I was un-invited to her boat-day party, too. By the end of the day, I think the only one who is still invited is the pink clown that we haven't tracked down yet!

Fluffy Gonzales

Hope found a dead cicada, or was it a locust? I have no idea if there is a difference. It was a big winged bug. She picked it up and carried it around all day, and named it "Fluffy" Gonzalez. I have no idea where she came up with a name like Fluffy Gonzalez. By the end of the day, the bug had become "Princess Fluffy Gonzalez".

Kids are funny

After we rolled the car window back up after dumping some coins in the fireman's boot (donation for Jerry's Kids, MDA), Simeon asked, "Why don't they just get jobs?!"

Our weekend guest

A couple more pictures of Coco, our weekend guest....

A Weekend Surprise

The wonderful guy I married decided that since the kids would be out of school on Friday we should plan a fun surprise weekend getaway. We picked them up from school on Thursday (with all the suitcases packed in the back of the suburban, covered with blankets), and told them we'd have some errands to run. They kept asking where we were going. We said to the dairy (the errand they hate the most, because it takes 30 minutes to get there). We drove and drove, and "got lost". So we stopped for dinner at Pizza Hut, stopped to see the scenery along the way, then "turned around to come home". About 9pm everyone had gone to sleep, and at 9:30 we arrived in Branson. We woke the kids up as we pulled into the hotel parking lot. They were so confused. They kept asking "Are we still lost? Are we in Bartlesville?" It was so fun to hear their squeals when they finally figured out we were in Branson and would be going to Silver Dollar City the next day!

It just so happened, too, that Liesel was the student of the week, and part of that entails bringing home the second grade class "pet", a stuffed cheetah named Coco. So Coco had the privilege of being our weekend guest, and actually got into the amusement park for free, although he wasn't tall enough to ride most of the rides. We did, however, sneak him on a couple of the milder ones. Evidently, cheetahs have weak stomaches (We also learned, just in the nick of time that cheetahs can't swim). We had loads of fun, especially considering that most of the kids were in school, and there was never a wait for any of the rides!

I do have to say, that we all kept feeling like someone was missing, and kept talking about how things would be different when we come back next year (maybe) with Ava. In the car, we wondered where Ava would sit (Hope said on HER lap), and we realized we would have to separate on the Lost River of the Ozarks, as the raft only seats 6, and Liesel took note that Ava would not be able to ride Fire in the Hole, because nobody with heart trouble is allowed to ride. We also realized we may have to get a suite next time, as there were too many kids and too many blankets sprawled all over the floor in the hotel room to get to the bathroom in the middle of the night! Life is exciting in the Urban's house....and about to get more exciting!