FAQ #2 Why Special Needs? (Why Down Syndrome)

Orphans with disabilities need families too!! Sadly, the orphans with disabilities are the most vulnerable AND the most difficult to place. In certain countries, disabled orphans are sent to institutions where most will die at a very early age. I never knew this until I met Andrea at Reece's Rainbow. I am thankful to her for bringing awareness to this very sad fact, and trying to find families for the most vulnerable and weak..the disabled orphan.

We had talked about special-needs adoption even before we were married. While we didn't have a set plan, we both agreed that we would be open to accepting a child into our family with a disability. There was a little boy at our church who was in foster care. He was 3 years old and had spina bifida. He couldn't walk on his legs, but he certainly didn't have any difficulty scooting himself with his hands. He was
such a delightful boy, and I found myself wishing I was his foster mother!!

Recently we had noticed a real gift of compassion in our children. Once at soccer practice, a mom came up to me, with tears in her eyes. Her son had a disability. He could walk but couldn't talk, and I got the impression that he could be aggressive and impulsive. The mom said to me, "Your son is one of the few kids who has ever played with my son. Most kids are afraid of him, but your son has played ball with him and talked to him today like nothing is wrong with him."

When God began stirring our hearts towards adoption this past year, we were pretty much open to anything, but we wanted to open our hearts toward a child that most other prospective adoptive parents would turn down. At that time the kids were in basketball, and there was a girl on Liesel's team with a little sister who had Down Sydrome. She was about 4 years old..the same age Ava will be when we bring her home! I would sit on the bench during practice and just watch and play with this little girl. I came home one night and told John, "I want to adopt a child with Down Syndrome." And that is when it all began.

We believe having a child with a disability can be a very negative experience or a very positive experience, all depending on how you look at it. Our family listened to a story on CD this summer about Corrie Ten Boom, and we haven't seen life the same since! We believe it will be a win-win for us all. She will get a family, and we will get the opportunity to entertain an angel! (Heb 13:2). I believe our lives will be greatly enhanced because of our daughter!

More proof that adoption is totally natural

Urban Adoption FAQ #1 Why Adopt?

While we wait for our approval/travel date, I wanted to compile a list, in writing, of some of the FAQ's of our adoption. Questions were to be expected, and while John and I had prayed, sought the Lord, and sensed without a doubt that adoption was part of His plan, we know it is helpful to have answers for people who ask, or wonder without asking. Since there are so many questions, and so many reasons, I will focus one per post. And the first one is the obvious:

Why Adopt?

1. Why not?
2. We have extra beds, plenty of food, and room for more around the table.
3. There is plenty of love to go around
4. There are millions of orphans praying every night for a family to call their own. We will get to be the answer to one of those prayers.
5. Our kids have asked on many occasions for more brothers and sisters. Why not take one that's already here on the earth?
6. I was always the kid bringing home abandoned and stray animals (even a dead skunk, once, which I was sure I could revive with the proper TLC). Now it's abandoned kids I'm on the lookout for.
7. Adoption is a beautiful picture of God's acceptance of us into His family, even with all of our problems and special needs.
8. James 1:27 "Pure religion is to look after the orphans and widows." How much more clear could that be?
9. 1 John 3:16-17 "But whoever has this world's goods and sees his brother in need and shuts up his heart from him, how does the love of God abide in him?" More than anything else, I want the love of God to abide in me.
10.Luke 12:48 "To whom much has been given, much is required." Our family has been blessed beyond measure. The least we can do is care for one of His sheep with whatever challenges may come with that.

There are many ways to help those who are special in God's eyes (the orphans and widows). It could be being a foster parent, providing clothing or food for families who are fostering, helping a widow mow her grass, babysitting for a single mom trying to put food on the table, "adopting" a college student, or person in a nursing home who gets no visitors, sponsoring an AIDS orphan in Africa, buying a pair of shoes for a child whose father is absent, adoption....the list is endless. I love this quote from Mother Teresa:

Being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, forgotten by everybody, I think that is a much greater hunger, a much greater poverty than the person who has nothing to eat.

A messenger in Ukraine

I had an email in my inbox today from a special family in Ukraine. Their adoption of little Evan is going smoothly. Valerie is going to try to see and hold Ava tomorrow, and hopefully take some new pictures for us. While she hasn't managed to take pictures yet, she has managed to go over to the crib where Ava lays and talk to her. Here is what Valerie said:

I got to see Ava again today for a few minutes and she looks completely healthy. Even though Inna and the caretakers keep saying the chicken pox are going around the orphanage, I have yet to see evidence of them. I am still waiting for a chance to ask Inna about pictures, but we are meeting with her tomorrow afternoon and I am hoping to get the go-ahead then (Kelly is also sending her an e-mail to ask if I can as well), so hopefully I will have some pictures to send to you very soon.

When I saw Ava today I said hello to her in Russian and she got so excited. She started waving her little arms all over the place and making noises! It was adorable. I really do hope that they will let me hold her a little. I think that she would just be in heaven! She is just so beautiful Charissa! Pictures just do not do her justice! I cannot wait until you have her in your arms (and I get to see pictures of the two of you together. . .I can just imagine the smile on her face)!

Anyway, I will definitely keep you posted about pictures and any time I get to spend with her! I am praying that you get your travel dates very, very soon!

Hugs,
Valerie

How Could I Ask For More

A poem by Liesel, my little poet and jokester

Twinkle Twinkle Happy Bliss (that's the dog)
You're my darling, kiss kiss kiss.
Such a baby in my eyes
I'm so glad to have a prize.
Twinkle Twinkle Happy Bliss
You're my darling, kiss kiss kiss.

And more...

Playing I Spy from the 50th floor of "Daddy's work" downtown (I have to admit, that was pretty fun)

Other things we have been doing to pass the time away....

Feeding trash to the buffalo--I'm serious. This buffalo is a vacuum sucking trash receptacle





Making shape pancakes, Dad's Saturday morning tradition. The funny thing about this particular shape pancake is that it started out as a monster truck pancake. When Jude decided he wanted a soccer ball pancake instead, John turned it upside down and said, "Hey Hope, do you want a cute little bunny rabbit pancake?" Of course she was thrilled!

Patience...

Proverbs 16:32 Better is a patient man (or woman) than a warrior.....
Ecclesiastes 3:1 To every thing there is a season, and a time to purpose under the heaven.
2 Timothy 2:24 And a servant of the Lord......must be patient.
Revelation 14:12 God's holy people must be patient.
Hebrews 10:36 For ye have need of patience, that, after ye have done the will of God, ye might receive the promise.

Here are a few things we are doing to pass the time while we wait for our travel date:

Dressing the dog like a princess

Vegging out in front of the television

Wildlife preserve park

Hiking

Smashing coins on the railroad track (is that even legal?!)

My week in three words

WAITING FOR AVA

Watch this.......What is your week in three words? Leave a comment.

Why I'm not crazy about road trips, and Why I can't hear myself think

Jude, the cutest "indian" in the kindergarten class

Check out the drawing he made on his indian vest...SO cute!

A Day of Thanksgiving Indeed

My sister and her husband (their very handsome son below)

My brother Joel, Hope, and my nephew Sebastian (please enlarge this picture and check out the eyelashes)

Our "adopted grandmother", Ms. Leader

Weird Americans....eating mexican food on Thanksgiving Day

My niece, Evi, singing a Thanksgiving song for our entertainment

If you think the Urbans are crazy......

If you think our family is crazy....
You ought to read about the Rieben family!

Richard and Valerie are the parents of 2 1/2 yr. old triplets (that's right, I said triplets!). That in and of itself makes them a crazy family, in my opinion. But they just returned from Uzbekistan two weeks ago. They returned with a little once-orphaned baby, Joshua, now a Rieben. And where are they now? In Ukraine...What are they doing there you might ask? They are bringing home another Rieben boy, Evan, a 3 yr. old with a medical condition affecting his muscle and limb development. Both children they are adopting have special needs and will require multiple surgeries, therapy, etc. These are special, special people, my friends.

Tomorrow I will be watching their blog very carefully. The orphanage where Evan lives happens to be the same orphanage where Ava lives. In fact, Evan and Ava are roommates! Valerie sent me the nicest email a couple of days ago promising to hold Ava and kiss her for us, and tell her that her family will be there soon for her. With all the craziness of her household, and planning a second international adoption in a 3 week period, that she would take the time to promise to send kisses to our daughter. That really meant the world to me. To know that Ava will be held soon, cuddled, kissed, talked to.... Pretty amazing! That makes the waiting a little bit more bearable tonight. Valerie, if you read this, THANK YOU. I can't wait to hear about her!

Is no news really good news? (Whoever made up that phrase never adopted internationally)

We expect to hear our travel date literally any day now. We were told to expect to wait 2-3 weeks from the day we submitted our dossier. Today it has been 3 weeks and 1 day. I am surprised at how email-obsessed I have become. There are tons of things I could be and should be doing right now, and instead, I keep checking my emails for a travel date. Things I should be doing right now:

1. Learning russian and Ukrainian cultural sensitity issues
2. Researching feeding issues
3. Looking for high chair, car seat, and exersaucer
4. Researching what kind of equipment we will need for whatever special needs Ava may come with.
5. Knitting a wool hat for Ava to wear (first I need to learn how to knit)
6. Reading a book about attachment issues in adoption (I actually have the books but I thought I would save them for the VERY long flight to Ukraine)
7. Reading up on disability benefits and insurance
8. Learning how to use that baby-sling I bought
9. Reading about different heart surgeries and post operative care
10.Shopping for a suitcase with wheels (we still use the green 1970s suitcases)
11.Buying long underwear and scarves
12.Making a list of instructions for whoever will watch the kids
13.Finding someone to watch the kids while we are gone (that is an important one!)
14.Start making a packing list
15.Making and freezing some meals for whoever will be watching the kids while we are gone
16.Taking pictures and making a family album to take to the orphanage with us
16.Pulling weeds
17.Cleaning bathrooms
18.Starting on the pumpkin and pecan pies for Thursday
19.Charging my cell phone
20.Comparing airline prices

Things I should NOT be doing right now:
Reading adoption blogs
Checking my email every 30 seconds

November is the month

Hope has been going around singing this little song from her preschool (to the tune of The Farmer in the Dell):

October is the Month
October is the Month
Hi Ho the Derry-O
October is the Month

I corrected her by telling her that actually now NOVEMBER is the month, and I began to sing the same song, substituting November for October.

Hope said, "No, it's NOT Nobember...it's TUESDAY."

A Sad Day on Sesame Street

A few years ago I was a good homeschooling mom, and we spent the whole month of November learning American history, particularly the first Thanksgiving. We did all sorts of crafts, and baking and really made it a special lesson! Come Thanksgiving Day, we were all sitting down to pray before our Thanksgiving feast, and Simeon said... "WHAT?! No Indians? Where are all the Indians?" Is it obvious why we decided homeschooling wasn't working out?

Date night

This is Simeon's month for "date night". Each month both John and I take one of the kids out for a special night out, and we rotate. Tonight was Simeon's night. I love having lots of kids but I LOVE LOVE LOVE parent-child date nights! It is so special and fun to just have uninterrupted conversation with one child.



Simeon is a great kid. I am so proud of him. I learned a lot about him by accident recently when I read a book called "The Out of Sync Child". It was recommended to me by a physical therapist in order to prepare our family for any sensory disorder Ava may come with because of her disability, but also because of her confinement to an Eastern European orphanage with very little sensory stimulation from the outside world. While it was very informative, the real lesson I learned was about my son! He fit to a "T" every description of the "sensory seeker" child...always craving more and more stimulation. He loves hard back rubs, loud music, boa-constrictor hugs, always feels the need to take his shoes off and jump in the mud puddles instead of walking around them, enjoys hearing himself scream loud, enjoys spicy foods, touching EVERY surface he passes, whether it be at home or in the grocery store, and chews on his shirts (He really does).




He is indeed a "sensory seeker". I only wish I would have read this book earlier. I thought back to all the times I scolded him for grabbing everything in sight, pounding on tables, kicking toys out of his way instead of bending over and picking them up....and the loud piercing voice. OUCH. And "why do you insist on chewing your shirt?!" "Why must you swing your arms around like that?!" I hope I haven't damaged him too much. I wish I would have realized his NEED for sensory stimulation and offered him better alternatives. A snack to eat instead of the shirt. Kick the soccer ball outside instead of the water bottle around the kitchen, pound a hammer and nails into wood in the garage instead of the fist on the table, etc.



He is such a great kid, has such a sweet and sensitive heart. Tonight he pointed out a truck with two bumper stickers. One said, "I love Jesus", the other said, "Yes this is my truck. No, I won't help you move." He pointed out, "Mom, if they really loved Jesus, they wouldn't mind helping someone move."

What is that smell?

For the past several days there has been a stench coming from somewhere in the living room...or maybe the kitchen. It's hard to say. We do not have a mice problem to our knowledge, but it smells.... like a dead animal.

The picture above is of our pet Delilah. My Uncle Tom breeds kingsnakes, and gave us one on a whim one night. (By the way, if you consider yourself a compassionate person, perhaps a pet snake is not for you. Imagine my distress the next day when I found out that there is no such thing as "snake food" they way you buy dog food at Petsmart. NO. Snakes are carnivores. Duh. Snakes eat bunnies and mice. That means if you have a snake you have to FEED them little soft cuddly fuzzy baby mice. Live ones. Ugh.)

We do not have Delilah anymore. What happened to her, we have no idea. I walked in one day to see the cage lid lifted and the snake GONE. We have not seen her since. That was about 3 months ago. We do know she was quite the escape artist. Once we found the lid up, and Delilah under the boys bed, coiled around a fake rubber snake. It was so hilarious. I guess she thought she found her mommy.

Now three months later there is a bad smell in the living room.I am afraid the stench is.....Well, you get my drift. Don't tell the kids!

Welcome Home Xander

One of my new adoptive cyberfriends, who is a wonderful mom as well as an excellent writer, happened to adopt her son from the same orphanage where our sweet little Ava resides temporarily. My cyberfriend is Shelley, and I hope she doesn't mind me sharing her blog containing a beautiful photo slideshow of Xander's life and recent grafting into the Bedford family. I have watched this four times now, and of course I've cried every time, partly because I am so happy for their family and for Xander, and (I have to be honest here), partly because I just cannot wait until it is us and Ava experiencing it!

There are good things and bad things, I suppose, about being able to have photos of your someday-to-be-adopted child. I get to see her so many times a day, and visualize rocking her, holding her. Yet I have to experience the agony every day of seeing her cute little button nose, her little hands closed so tightly in a fist, her beautiful blue eyes, and my favorite part of her I admit is her soft little uni-brow....knowing that nobody is rocking her to sleep, stroking that cute little unibrow, admiring her beautiful eyes, and button nose, or loaning her a finger to grip. I just feel like I can't get there fast enough, and yet the Lord reminds me that His timing is perfect. John wrote the sweetest letter to Ava, that maybe she will be able to read someday. If not we will read it to her. We wish we could have had 4 years that seem wasted in a lonely crib, but we know He will let us make up for those years somehow.

So here is the link to Xander's welcome home video. I hope you enjoy it as I have. (P.S. The little boy in the red Reebok suit in the crib with Xander, is not a little boy at all. That is our sweet Ava, another reason why I have cried watching this. Xander is not there to stroke her little face and fingers anymore. I wonder if she worries about what happened to her little friend!)

When Jude grows up

About a week ago I was telling John how happy I was when Jude told me recently that he wants to be a pastor when he grows up. Simeon was overhearing this conversation and had a really worried and puzzled look on his face. I asked him what was wrong, and he said, "Mom, why would you be happy that Jude wants to be a 'gangster' when he grows up?!" Ah, the power of one syllable.

We have been praying specifically for two orphans in Eastern Europe. One is a little girl who was just on the verge of being adopted, and lost her family at the last minute (long story). The other is a little boy, who also has a mild disability, whose chances of being adopted have just dropped because two of his siblings were recently abandoned. The laws of the country are that orphaned sibling sets can't be separated. The chances of finding a family who would take 3 siblings, one of whom has special needs, are pretty slim. Both of these children face institutionalization if not adopted very, very soon.

So after we prayed for them tonight, Jude said, "Mom, when I grow up I want to start an orphanage. And I'm going to build a church inside the orphanage, and I'm going to be the pastor." I just started boohooing. I asked him if I can come work with him. I said, "You can preach, and I can change diapers and rock babies." He just grinned.

Ten Great Things About Adopting a Child With Special Needs

1. No surprises: You know from the start just how bad it might be.

Some parents adopt a child they think is perfectly healthy, only to find out down the road that there are serious problems. Adopting a child with identified special needs lets you hit the ground running.

2. Most special-needs parents don't have social workers coming by with suggestions.

Follow-ups and home visits may seem invasive and unnecessary, but since there's no getting out of them, use them to your advantage. See if you can actually get some useful advice on where to find services and support.

3. No guilt that your personal genes or prenatal care caused your child's problems.

Skip right over the grief or shame and go directly to getting the appropriate diagnosis and help.

4. Exempt from one-upmanship contests at adoption agency reunions.

You know those moms: the ones who are so invested in getting a perfect baby that they practically launch into a chorus of "Anything yours can do mine can do better!" You can sit out that competition, smug in your grasp of the important things in life.

5. Stick it to the insurance company!

Think of all the benefits you would have wasted if you'd adopted a healthy child! Might as well take that HMO for everything you can get.

6. If you get to the end of the day and everybody's alive, that was a good day.

Perhaps at one time you had goals for yourself -- exercising, reading, losing weight, getting your offspring ready for a good Ivy League college. Adopt a child with special needs, and your priorities will change for the simpler, pronto.

7. Typical child development? BO-ring!

Most moms just learn about whether to feed a cold or a fever. You'll learn enough to qualify you for a life experience degree in pediatrics.

8. Good chance that your child won't "get it" when people are rude about adoption.

"What happened to his real parents?" "Do you have any children of your own?" People say the darnedest things about adoption, often right in front of your child. If your child has special needs that affect her communication skills, she'll likely remain blissfully oblivious. (You should be so lucky.)

9. People will be under the impression that you're a saint -- HA!

Oh, sure, you'll want to set them straight, and swear that you're the blessee, not the blesser. They won't believe you. If only they knew!

10. Medical bills? Costly. Making a difference in the life of a child? Priceless.

If you want a perfect baby to complete some vision you have of your ideal family ... then, come to think of it, you probably shouldn't adopt at all. But if you want a truly transformative experience that will change you and your child into a new entity altogether -- a real, working, struggling, striving, conquering, all-for-one one-for-all team -- consider adopting a child with special needs. You'll make an enormous difference for your child, and your child will return the favor.

I loved this! I found it on about.com.

I personally would add a few other great things about adopting a child with special needs:

1. We get to work as a family to help her reach her full potential.
2. We get to live out the Scriptures every day...helping those in need, preferring others over ourselves, learning patience and perseverance, being thankful in all things.
3. We get to see giftings develop in our other children.
4. Our love multiplies!
5. A great excuse to get out of activities we didn't really want to be involved in anyway.
6. We get to experience what is really important in life.
7. I'll never have to go through "Empty Nest Sydrome".
8. We get to be Christ's hands and feet (Ps. 10:14 You are the helper of the fatherless)
9. We get to welcome Jesus (Mt. 18:5 Whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me)
10.A really great kid gets a chance at life!!!

November is National Adoption Month!! (an article from Family Life)

Why This Matters To God
The World's Waiting Children Matter
The numbers are staggering...More than 143 million orphans worldwide...every 14 seconds an AIDS death leaves another child orphaned...more than 800,000 children pass through America foster care system each year.

Yet, there is One who cares — our Father in heaven. Throughout the Bible, God shares his compassion, his love, and his special concern for the most vulnerable among us — the orphan. The world’s waiting children. Children with no father or mother to protect them, waiting for someone to care for them, someone to love them.

“Dispense true justice and practice kindness and compassion each to his brother; and do not oppress the widow or the orphan…”
— Zechariah 7:9-12
The Scriptures are clear that the Lord gives the family of God the responsibility to care for the orphan's needs — to love and protect them. In fact, God's concern for orphans is so central to his plan for us here on earth that he inspired James to write: "Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained by the world," (James 1:27)

Why would God tell us that caring for orphans is "pure and undefiled religion"?

Maybe it’s because the world sees God’s heart when he works through his people to help the helpless. And maybe it’s because caring for orphans is such a perfect picture of our relationship with God. In our inability to please God in our own efforts, in our utter helplessness to initiate a relationship with him, we are more like orphans and strangers than we like to admit.

It’s time for the body of Christ to step up. The urgent needs of orphans around the world are calling the Christian community today to a radical faith. One church, one family, one person can make a difference.

Today God is stirring the hearts of his people to this incredible need and opportunity. There is a movement of an increasing number of churches and evangelical organizations worldwide who are coming together as one voice to not only raise awareness but more importantly to mobilize the body of Christ to take action on behalf of the orphan.

“Vindicate the weak and fatherless; do justice to the afflicted and destitute. Rescue the weak and needy; deliver them out of the hand of the wicked.”
— Psalm 82:3-4

Boys

My friend Jill, with 2 boys, sent me this, and we laughed as we both could relate to so much of this. BOYS! My boys discovered that if they run really fast after pushing the garage door opener, they could make it in time to grab on to the bottom of the garage door, which would carry them up to the ceiling. This was really fun until the garage door fell off the hinges! Once I walked outside to see Simeon with his hands behind his back bending over to pick up a sharp-pointed stick (one that was whittled to a point on both ends), sticking out of the ground. He was trying to pick the sharp point of the ground...with his teeth, mouth opened wide leaning over the sharp point. It's all fun and games until somebody gets hurt.

P.S. If you have a boy story, PLEASE SHARE.

And you also find out interesting things when you have sons, like...

1. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house
4 inches deep.

2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller
blades, they can ignite.

3. A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded
restaurant.

4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong
enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman
cape. It is strong enough, however, if tie d to a paint can, to spread
paint on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room.

5. You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When
using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times
before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.

6. The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit
by a ceiling fan.

7. When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's already
too late.

8. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.

9. A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a
36-year old Man says they can only do it in the movies.

10. Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4- year old
Boy.

11. Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.

12. Super glue is forever.

13. No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can't
walk on water.

14. Pool filters do not like Jell-O.

15. VCR's do not eject "PB & J" sandwiches even though TV commercials
show they do.

16. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.

17. Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.

18. You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.

19. Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not
like ovens.

20. The fire department in Austin , TX has a 5-minute response time.

21. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.

22. It will, however, make cats dizzy.

23. Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.


24. 80% of Women will pass this on to almost all of their friends, with
or without kids.

25. 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.

This photo was taken by my brother Jason just a few weeks ago in Kenya.

A note from Meru, Kenya

Someone has asked for an update from my parents as they are in Meru, Kenya for the next several weeks and have no way to update their blog (vicariouslytogether.blogspot.com). This is the only email we have received, as internet access is obviously difficult to find. They do have a cell phone that can receive text messages, if you would like to contact them, leave a comment and I can tell you how to do that.

We have been comfortable in the arrangements for sleeping under a
mosquito net. The local clinic reports that 1-3 cases of Malaria come
daily to receive medications. This is the rainy season and the female
mosquitoes, here called Mosqweetos..are in full vigor.
Saturday a group of 50 children were fed, who were orphaned because of
HIV/AIDS. We have been astounded by the amount of HIV positive
individuals who have no hope but a painful death. Some of the obvious
lack of energy or mental alertness might be connected to a very poor
protein diet.
A great surpise for us was to find a stash of 42 new books written in
English, on topics related to Africa. These books were passed out at a
pastor’s conference to workers etc. Our local leader came home with
Amazon.com value of $1,000 worth of text’s, concordances, study
Bibles, Maps, written by Kenyans, scholars, some from Zondervan,
Navigator
Press etc. It was sad and shameful these books were in a box, some
still
in their plastic wrap, and none of the English speaker school teachers
had
read about the AIDS threat, the encroaching Islam menace. It was
enlightening to read of the Christian Historic movement in Sudan,
Ethiopia
and some of the Kingdoms like the Aztec Kingdom of Mexico, some with
evidence of awareness of Jewish and Christian principles.
The ongoing clash and conflict of HOW TO HELP PEOPLE rages in my mind.

Like the Katrina victims, some still want FEMA to give them a place to
stay, feed them and send their kids to school. AT WHAT POINT have you
stopped helping people and begin to HURT them. So the Thraka people
teaching their children to READ AND WRITE Thraka…when no books but
the
Bible exist in their language? How will they read manuals of VISTA
WINDOWS FOR DUMBIES? Interestingly the history of Africa there was a
King who wanted his tribe to learn Greek, to read the Wisdom of Athens!
We wanted to fix the road, filling up the potholes, which a small
Volkswagen would fit, and with pick and shovel, put dirt and gravel in
the low spots! NOT WITHOUT a permit from the local Chief. A small
town
has a barrier, pole and they taxed anyone bearing luggage, bags of
produce going to market. Everyone justified the taxing, saying it was
to
fix roads, but none of the roads we traveled seemed to be fixed.
I road on the back of a motorcycle Tuesday to catch the City Bus. The
guy who collected tickets offered me a better seat, and I thought I
would
like riding on the HUMP of the wheel well, with a beautiful view of the
country side. The driver went 74 miles per hour on country roads, with
potholes and slime pits, I realized the conductor taking tickets was
wise
in suggesting I sit anyplace except on top of a wheel well in a vehicle
with no suspension and no springs.
We drove on the wrong side of the road, and honked for cattle pulling
sleds to get out of our way. I don’t think any ride at Disney or
Magic
Kingdom would give the thrill of riding on a bus with Swahili music
blaring full blast.
Three times I’ve been to the larger city, and all times the servers
were
down. I keep trying to calibrate a handset with my laptop which will
allow me to go to a browser on the Internet. I waited 6 minutes for
the
full page of Yahoo to open up. Since people pay per mega that is
downloaded, it just takes time.
People sing while they work. Most men wear suit coats, even field
workers. I think the image of preachers with coat and tie, they
connected
suit coats to respectful images. I saw a gardener working his field
with
worn and tattered suit coats.
I took pictures yesterday, and all of the kids were black, and all had
the same uniform on. I asked them each to pose holding a bucket, a
mop,
standing next to a wall, a tree, a bike so I could emphasize
individuality.
Every morning they play drums, and I took their hymnal and starting
singing Standing on the Promises… DUMO…DUMO. And they all lit up
and
smiled. Funny how when you learn to say something in a language that
they cherish, it strikes a cheerful note.
I’ve found many religiously minded businessmen, the Hand of God
Cyber
Café..his initials are HOG Cyber. Many Bible Texts. I wished he
would
have been more knowledgeable and could get my laptop connected to their
Internet, After 4 Cyber Shops and 4 technicians, one of them removed
all
of my Anti Virus which did not please me.
We are learning our own limitations, and that these people are much
healthier than black people in Chicago who have Diabetes…here there
is
none, and I have YET to find anyone with a weight problem. They are
all
very slim, lanky and thin.
Charissa Urban at charissaurban@yahoo.com has found a Prefix, a
Country
Code and a number she can send text messages to us. Send her an email
and she can get this to you if you want to pop us a note.
God has a plan for Africa, and the Thraka people are part of his
diadem
of his crown. Meanwhile, we have been called to LOVE, and SERVE and we
thank you for your prayers for us as we experience different sounds,
different smells, different colors..
There is a mongoose family that runs through the trees at night with a
bark. When we have gotten up early we see them playing running up and
down fence posts, frolicking.
The Wild Life that used to roam these plains is now protected in a
National Park 40 miles away. No wild life, large game, is left, my
friend says it is because they are all very good hunters. They did a
good job and hunted it all.
Trees vanished, mahogany trees once were more evident. I see outhouses
and fence posts with the wood that is considered semi precious in the
USA.
It would be a college education in sociology for anyone to just come
and
hang out and learn from these people. I think being here for an
extended
time allows us to get to feel their pain and their joys. Last night
their leader was burdened as a staff member had taken upon himself to
be
like Americans, and just go ‘live with his girl friend’ and not
respect
the tribal customs of getting the parents blessing with the church.
Yesterday my technician visiting informed me that the monitors on a
computer adjust themselves, but he wanted to tweak the program to
adjust
the size. I can’t remember the last time I opened up a Windows 95
on a
computer, and all 8 women were spell bound with the phenomena of a
computer which ran off of a power plant.

ADOPTION UPDATE!

Just kidding! I wish. Still just waiting, and waiting and waiting....and waiting. Ho hum. Tweedle dee. Waiting is so boring. I can't believe it's only been 9 days since we submitted to the SDA. Seems like much longer.

I have been spending a lot of time at the computer waiting for that long awaited email to come announcing our travel date. Thus all the recent blogging, and picture downloading. No email. I'll check again in 5 minutes.

Meet Bliss

This is Bliss, our golden retriever. 12 years ago on my birthday, John walked into our first apartment carrying a little golden furball with a pink ribbon around her neck. If there had been blogs 12 years ago, this blog would have been solely devoted to Bliss. We used to take her out for fast food, waterskiing at the lake, ice skating on the pond in the winter, swimming, camping, on family trips. We even took her to a photo studio to have her pictures taken professionally!!! (I can't believe I just admitted that). She went in the car with us everywhere and we opened the sun roof so she could stick her head out the top and let her jowls and ears flap in the wind. (For some reason that is really fun for a dog). My brother made fun of me for putting diapers on her, and bathing her once a week....in my bathtub.

Look at her now. How things have changed. The vet said her thyroid is low. Maybe that's why she lays around all the time. Or maybe because she's old. Maybe because she has arthritis. Who knows? (I confess, I didn't buy the thyroid replacement or spend $85 on an x-ray) One thing I know though is that she is happy, and she has been the best dog anybody could ever ask for. Isn't it obvious?

P.S. I just learned that red-eye removal does not work on dogs.

Candy Sculptures

There's more than one way to get rid of Halloween candy....Candy sculptures! Notice there are no Snickers Bars, Milky Ways, M&M's or Reece's Peanut Butter cups on this "candy castle". Hmmmm. I know they were in the bags a couple of days ago...I'm not sure where they went! (Wink) Oh well, there are plenty of Tootsie Rolls, Dum Dums and Smarties to do the job. :)

Anyone selling a limo?

Jude told me that once Ava gets here it's going to be pretty squished in the back seat of the Suburban. He said we need to buy a limo. Anyone have a limo they're wanting to get rid of? :)

He's so cute I can hardly stand it!

CHRISTMAS ANGEL TREE

Starting today, you will be able to sponsor the adoption of one of THESE BEAUTIFUL ANGELS. Click on 2007 Christmas Angel Tree Project, then Waiting Angels Gallery, to see photos of the children who are still praying every night for a family.

When we "picked" Ava, she came with a grant of $1005. With grant money, the chances of an orphaned child getting adopted really multiplies. These kids depend on people like you and me to help them find a forever family! I am thankful for Andrea, who helped us find our sweet Ava, and for which ever person or persons felt led in their heart to donate towards her adoption. We are living proof that these grants really help! For a $35 donation you will receive a beautiful photo ornament of your child. What a beautiful gift this would be for your mother-in-law, an aunt, grandparents, you know, those people who already have everything they need. How about a Secret Santa gift, or a gift for someone you know who happens to have or happens to love someone who has Down Syndrome! I really hope someone who reads my blog today would give a desperate orphaned child this wonderful gift. Keep in mind that the older children (3 and up) are most at risk for being moved to a mental institution and never having a chance for a family. These two children, Vadim and Varsha, will be hanging on our Christmas tree this year. This will remind us to pray them, and for a family to say "Yes" to the call of adoption.

A conversation between two kids

I love eavesdropping on kids' conversations.

This is one that took place in the back of the Suburban on the way home from school.

Simeon: Hope, look at my beetle pupae, they're baby beetles.
Hope: Oh. Can I hold the baby beetles?
Simeon: No, because they're for my homework. I don't want you to squish them.
Hope: Pease? I won't 'quish them. I p'omise.
Simeon: No, you can't hold them.
Hope: Fine, then, I won't be your brother anymore.

This reminded me of another backseat conversation I heard a few years back between Liesel and Simeon. They were around 3 and 5. I don't remember what they were arguing about, but I clearly remember Liesel ending it by saying, "FINE THEN, I'M NOT GONNA MARRY YOU ANYMORE!"

We are blessed

And so are you. Take this test to see just how so.

Click here

We got excited about the thought of plucking Ava up from the poorest of the poor and moving her in with the richest of the rich....Just like Jesus did for us!

We in America have so much, so much that we take it for granted. Consider sharing some of your extra with someone in need.

The Urbans love orphans

We had a meeting at the Little Lighthouse tonight which will be Ava's future school. It was an informational meeting for parents of newly diagnosed children with special needs who are on the waiting list for their child to attend there.

We had to miss all 3 soccer practices tonight in order to be there. The kids were a little disappointed about missing practice, but got really excited when we told them why we would be missing practice. I told them there was a meeting at Ava's new school, and there would be childcare. Jude asked (of course it would be Jude asking), "Mom, do we get to play with a bunch of orphan kids?"

My special hiding place

About 2 or 3 months ago, John gave me a great idea. He suggested I put my purse on top of the refrigerator where Hope can't reach it, since she loves my gum and my lip gloss so much. You know, remove the temptation. So I thought this was so brilliant that I put Simeon's pocket knives, special snacks, plus anything else special that I don't want her to find.

Today when I reached up to grab my purse off the top of the refrigerator, I saw that Hope now has her own "stash" of things to protect up there. She had her little purse, a few dimes and nickels, her tiny pink Bible (thanks Aunt Donita-every one of my kids has treasured their little personalized pink and blue bibles), and her prized tube of lipgloss that she earned by sleeping all night in her own bed. I'm not sure who she is hiding these things from. I just thought it was SO funny. No wonder I keep finding the barstool right smack in front of the refrigerator!

A letter from John

This was so sweet it made me cry. John wanted to be the one who made our adoption announcement to my extended family members (by email). He wouldn't let me read it until after it was already sent. So here is what he wrote:

There is a new little Urban on the way...

We know the gender. Its a girl!

We've even seen pictures of her using a normal camera.
In fact, she's already on this earth waiting for her forever family to take her home. We even have a name for her.. Ava Alina Grace Urban.

She is a special person, but then again aren't we all.
She has some special needs, and again, don't we all.

She has a smile that just brightens the room.
She has a heart, that although may need a little adjusting, is ready to give every Rovenstine the biggest hug you've ever had.

Her eyes, needing a little adjusting, are some of the most beautiful eyes you've ever seen.

She's a gem. A priceless gold nugget that Jesus thinks is worth traveling half way across the globe for [James 1:27].
She's going to bring life, joy and great love to our home.

We hope you will welcome, love, accept and hug her true Rovenstine protocol. She's going to bless you, I promise.

John Urban - Simeon, Liesel, Jude, Hope and Ava's dad.

Scooby and "The Gang"